Astrology
Which Planets Determine Your Love Language? The Astrology Explained
You’ve likely heard this before: The best way to connect deeply with your partner is by showing them love in the way they like to receive it. These are called “love languages,” and the concept is based on Gary Chapman’s book, The 5 Love Languages. The whole thing makes total sense, right? But it can get tricky when you start drawing blanks on what your partner’s love language actually is… or, for that matter, what yours is.
That’s where astrology comes in. Whether it’s about giving or receiving love, your birth chart holds the key to discovering your love language — and your partner’s.
What Are the 5 Love Languages?
First, let’s define each love language, so we know what we’re working with here:
Physical Touch (PT): Relies on physical touch from a partner (e.g., hand holding, hugs, massages, a hand on the knee under the table)
Words of Affirmation (WA): Relies on affirming or reassuring words from a partner (e.g., “I really appreciate you” or “I love the way you love me.”)
Quality Time (QT): Relies on receiving positive and committed time from a partner (e.g., experiences together or a no-phone dinner rule)
Gift Giving (GG): Relies on receiving physical gifts or tokens from a partner (e.g., flowers at the end of a long day, little post-it notes in the house, presents for no reason)
Acts of Service (AS): Relies on receiving small aid from a partner (e.g., a packed lunch, picking up medication, doing the dishes after dinner, taking your car to get washed)
The Astrology of the 5 Love Languages
Okay, so how does astrology play into this? From an astrologer to you, there are two things you need to know. First, your birth chart doesn’t just represent your personality. It’s a mirror to your past (including childhood experience and even karmic makeup). What this means is that it can tell us what childhood conditionings occurred in your past that would make you more likely to respond better to one love language over another. So, you were actually born into your preferred love language — and you can see this in the birth chart!
Second, there are three planets that represent relationship dynamics — including emotional involvement, sex drive/attraction, and partnership. That’s where you’ll find exactly how you like to receive love, but also how you like to give love as well. (And they may not be the same!) These planets are: the Moon, Venus, and Mars.
Moon
The Moon represents the love language you like to receive.
The Moon represents our inner emotional world. Whatever sign it’s in will dictate what we need in order to feel nurtured, comfortable, and emotionally secure. This soft spot in our system will give you the answers to what you need in order to make someone feel comfortable.
For instance, someone with a Taurus moon would feel emotionally secure when the physical surroundings are secure. Thus, this person feels connected through physicality and touch. So, someone with a Taurus moon would need either physical touch or gift giving.
Here’s a quick list of love languages each Moon sign would like to receive:
Aries Moon: QT or WA
Taurus Moon: GG or AS
Gemini Moon: WA or QT
Cancer Moon: PT or QT
Leo Moon: WA or PT
Virgo Moon: AS or GG
Libra Moon: QT or WA
Scorpio Moon: PT or AS
Sagittarius Moon: QT or WA
Capricorn Moon: AS or WA
Aquarius Moon: QT or AS
Pisces Moon: QT or PT
Venus
Venus represents the love language you like to receive (and potentially give).
Venus is the planet of love, partnership/harmony, beauty, aesthetic, and pleasure. Basically, when it comes to relationships, Venus talks about how we go about partnership. What is most important to us in partnership? What are our relationship values? How do we create harmony in the relationship?
With those questions in mind, the Venus placement can discuss how we approach relationships and with what intention we give them. However, it can also represent what you find valuable in partnership… and therefore need in order to feel appreciated and loved. So, the Venus placement can represent both the love language you like to receive and the one you like to give.
An example might be this: Someone with Venus in Libra will consider relationships to be a natural give-and-take. This person craves balance, independence, intellectual stimulation, but also deep emotional connection. In order to create a space for that kind of love to grow, a Libra Venus person might give (and need) plenty of quality time.
Mars
Mars represents the love language you like to give.
Mars is the planet of energy, motivation, anger, and sexuality. Thus, in a relationship, Mars will directly symbolize all the carnal parts of a relationship—including attraction, lust, passion, and sex drive. But this is also why Mars represents the love language that we give. It’s about our action! So, we would use our Mars placement to ask someone out, show your partner you love them, send “come hither” signals across a bar, or seduce someone into bed. As you can see, Mars covers a lot! But essentially, this placement will be the way you show someone you care.
A person with Mars in Virgo, for instance, would likely show their love through making sure their partner’s car is washed or making dinner for them after a long day at work. In bed, a Virgo Mars person would definitely be the “giver” between the sheets. So, the love language this person would give is definitely acts of service.
